Saturday, September 22, 2012

I should probably add a few pictures...

I've been too lazy to add any pictures to my computer over the last month so my recent posts have been a little boring. Hopefully, these will help:
In August we visited a local experimental farm and learned much about local agriculture. Either that or we just went in some bouncy castles, ate some tasty treats, checked out the tractors and such and took a hay ride. 
Jay and I had simultaneous Bachelor/Bachelorette parties. This is one of my bridesmaids who accompanied me to dinner before the festivities.
Things got considerably more interesting from there. Most of the other pictures that ended up on my phone are not appropriate for this site. This lovely gentleman is one of Jason's groomsmen.
This Groom was from another bachelor party happening that night. St. John's has a very small street that has the world's record for the most bars. The street becomes pedestrian only at night and is basically one large party! I hope his wedding was at least a few days after this. That's permanent marker all over his face.
We hiked with a visiting friend.
Bought wedding clothes.
Owen and I hung out a lot while the other boys were at school. This was a walk around downtown St. John's. That's signal hill in the background (which is where our reception will take place).
Jay and I attended an 80s themed birthday party.
We spent the evening at the beach with our church for the annual corn boil.
We visited the geo centre (the site of our reception) to check out some of the exhibits.
We visited another local farm.
Micah started at a new school (sorry for the blur). 
First day of school.
We took Owen to a local fire station during a special 'doors open' day. 
He was quite the super star.
We went out for wings (twice!).
Leslie visited us and did a little damage to our swing set.
Jay and I got our marriage licence

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

The story behind our honeymoon

I dont know if I ever pictured my wedding growing up. I was never the type of girl to play dress up or with barbies, preferring to run around outside with my brothers instead.

Even when I was engaged to The Ex, I didn't give the wedding that much thought. I looked for ways to have a fairly cheap celebration and planned a low key affair of only a couple thousand. In the end it didn't happen and we separated before anything was ever really in place.

This time, I had bought all the invitation supplies before many of our friends even knew we were engaged. I dove head first into the planning and have since spent a full nine months on the details. My parents are helping with the cost and so we have more options, but there's more to the differences.

Jason and I have had to deal with comments about the size of and hoopla surrounding our wedding day from both family and friends. Our decisions have been questioned time and again, mostly because of money (though culture does come into play as well). Why are we having a big wedding (there's only 97 people!)? Why not just h'ordeurves? Why pay for a venue with a bar instead of a hall where you can bring your own alcohol? Why a plated meal? Why a DJ? Why formal invitations? Are chair covers necessary? Why are we renting tuxes?

It's been difficult but the bottom line is this:

Jason and I have never done or planned anything simply the way we wanted it. We've always compromised because of finances, our social position, the kids, life. We make choices every day based on the baggage we carry around from our pasts. Of course, everyone does this. Im not saying that others dont  have issues that affect their choices, that would be absurd. Instead, Im saying that perhaps because I was a single, high school drop out, teen mom, I made choices that a married, financially secure, mature 30 something mother wouldn't.

Maybe I can explain a little further.

In the data from the professional research I do, women who are struggling financially or socially sometimes over compensate by spending more money on things like clothing or shoes for their children simply to avoid further attention. If they're already being judged because of X then they will do whatever they can to avoid being judged because of Y, when X and Y tend to go together. Make sense?

So with that logic, Jason and I are working hard to have the wedding we want and aren't willing to compromise because weddings like ours aren't for people like us. We're starting our married life together by claiming our positions in this world. We do not want to live in the shadow of our pasts simply because culture says we should. We are jumping head first into this life and have thankfully learned a few things from our pasts to help us make our dreams a reality.

This starts with the wedding but will continue long after.

One way this is happening is that Jason and I are honeymooning in Rome next month. We're taking a week to connect as a couple because we think it's important. We met when I had four children and have had to work around the kids to have any sort of relationship, so this week of just the two of us will be a first. We're also the first people I know to take a honeymoon.

Now I have to be honest here and say that our honeymoon isnt being paid for completely by us. Not even half of it is. My brother is gifting us with the flights and my parents have gifted us with our hotel. We found both through selloffvacations for a good deal and are beyond thankful for the help. We set up a honeyfund registry instead of a regular one so that loved ones can choose fun activities for us to do as opposed to gifting us with a better toaster. Everything we do there will be paid for by us, unless people gift us with certain opportunities. Either way, we're prepared and super excited.

Never have Jason or I dreamed that we'd have this big, somewhat expensive wedding and a honeymoon in Rome but are beyond thrilled to be starting our lives together this way.

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Eighteen Days

Im getting married in 18 days. That's nuts. Every morning I click on theknot, even though there's nothing new to see or keep track of anymore, just to see the number. I know before hand how many days are left but I still cant help looking it up, like maybe Im just dreaming or something.

Im feeling rambly.

I haven't blogged in forever and have no excuse. Im not even doing anything with my days. But whatevs.

The kids started school a couple of weeks ago and have already had a day off because of Leslie. I never really know what to call that storm. It was a hurricane, it was a tropical storm, by the time it was over us it was a post tropical storm with hurricane level 1 winds. Either way, the schools shut down and our swing set blew over onto our shed.

Anywho, the kids all seem to be doing well. Owen is bored out of his mind being at home all day with me and can't wait for school next year. James and Noah both say they have the best teachers in the world. They are now the only two at their school and it's the cutest thing to watch them disappear into the school doors together or come to the car holding hands.

Micah started at a junior high this year though he's only in grade six. All french immersion students in our city must go to this school for this one grade because of space issues. It's rather a hassle, given the traffic nonsense surrounding the school. Thankfully, he walks to his old school in the afternoons so that I can pick them all up in the same spot. Academically, I have no idea whats going on as he no longer uses an agenda and curriculum night isnt until next week. He started with a tutor over the summer and is continuing with that every week though, so I have some confidence the year wont be a waste!

Next year he'd like to transfer to the junior high in our neighbourhood but they only offer a late immersion program for students who have had english instruction up through elementary school. I worry that the program will be that much less challenging that he'll get bored and do even worse. On the other hand, he is struggling with the french at this level and Im not entirely sure he'll be at grade level by the end of the year anyway. Decisions, decisions!

One thing is for sure though; next summer will include a trip to St. Pierre to boost all the boys' french skills. It is a tiny island just off the coast of Newfoundland that is actually a part of France. There's a ferry we can take over but it's pedestrian only so exploring the island may be a bit difficult, as public transportation isnt that great. How cool is it though that we have a piece of Europe practically at our doorstep?

Other than school, we're not doing much, The wedding is taking a lot of our funds and mental energy so we're waiting until that's over to get back into the normal routines. Taekwondo and swimming lessons, mainly. Micah is into BMX now though as his sport of choice and though it's expensive, it's definitely less so than hockey and less of a time commitment from us so we're happy to support it. He goes off to the skate park a couple of times each week and when the winter comes, we'll be driving him to the indoor skate park in St. John's.

And that's us in a nutshell..